My 4 Favorite Things About Being Engaged :: Month Three Edition

As of yesterday, its been THREE whole months since Alonso popped the question and I've realized recently that I don't really feel engaged. I supposed I haven't felt engaged since the hype of the proposal faded. I know that I am, duh. I use words like these a lot:

engagement
wedding
fiancé
Pinterest, ha. 

But I don't feel engaged.

It could be because we are cutting through a.lot. of red tape with the government. It could also be because I'm in another country who's engagement and wedding traditions are not like ours. {SIDE NOTE: Let's be honest. Who else in the world makes a fuss over proposals and Pinterest boards the way we do?} Or maybe it's because my mom, sister, and best friends aren't here to relish in the saga with me. Lastly, it could be that I can't exactly plan a wedding from Costa Rica, so much of it is on hold, and also awaiting a pretty little visa approval. 

Regardless, I decided the other day that I. AM. ENGAGED. and, best friends or no best friends, I shall savor the moments I have left to say, "This is my fiancé." So I began to intentionally looks for things about our engagement that excites me. And can I just tell you ... you would not BELIEVE how cool engagement is. Who knew?

So allow me to share with you 4 of my favorite things about being engaged.

Number Uno:  He gets me. 

I can be a hormonal little freak at times. So I probably tell him weekly, "You don't get me!!" in a mess of mascara tears and some other theatrical phrases thrown around. But when I'm not fighting dramatic-woman-syndrome, I totally appreciate the mess out of him. He knows how to handle me when I'm sad. He rejoices with me when I'm excited. But most importantly, he understands the passions inside of me and guess what? He's on board. His heart is as radical as mine and his convictions are as strong. There aren't a whole lot of people out there who truly 'get' us, amen? So when you find the one who does, marry 'em. So reason #1 is that the dude understands me. 

Number Dos: Planning, or not planning. 

I'm a planner. Type-A. List-maker. Organizer. Things have an order and they need to stay in it - if you ask me. Now what I'm about to say may sound crazy to some of you but just go with me for a second. I remember several January's ago when I was with my mom in Walmart. We were shopping for Christmas decorations because they were all on sale from the previous December. I remember telling her, "This is so frustrating! How am I supposed to know whether I should buy one stocking or two? What if I'm married by next Christmas? Or what if I'm not? What if I'm pregnant with a little girl - cause I definitely need that small pink Christmas tree over there!" She thought I was crazy so it's okay if you do too, but see my point. When you're engaged or married, you know who you're planning for and who you're planning it with. And while life will always throw unexpected curveballs, you at least know who you're in the batters box with. OR we can not plan for something like, a weekend or a rainy afternoon, and I still know we'll be together. Either way, it brings a sense of security that no other season in my life has brought. So reason #2 is that I can plan colors for a house, family vacations, Christmas decorations and many other things knowing that my best friend will be there for it all. 

Numero Tres: The ring. 

And I don't mean mine. Girls wear jewelry - it's normal. And even during an engagement, I get to wear a ring. So on the big day, the only thing that will change for me is that I will put on two more rings with the one I have now. Alonso, however, does not get to wear a ring right now and I LOVE THAT. Did you know I love weddings? I have always loved going to and being in weddings. And in my top two favorite things about a wedding is seeing the husband wearing his ring at the reception. Don't ask me why I love it so much because I couldn't tell ya. But something about seeing a man with a new ring on his left hand - it's just cute. It says commitment ... groom ... husband. So reason #3 is that these are the final days that Alonso's left ring-finger will be bare. I get butterflies when I think about what will soon make its home there. 

Numero Cuatro: New initials. 

Call me 'southern' or outdated or whatever. But in the last few years monogrammed items have become overwhelmingly popular in the U.S. Except that in the last two years I have lived in the States for a total of about a month and a half. So I have not been included in this phenomenon. Therefore, when I come home (which is soon) I fully intend on monogramming everything that will sit still ... with my new initials. That's right, I'm going from aBd to aHb and girlfriend, I am real excited about that. {Funny story about this: when I first realized that my initials would change, I could not wait to put them on something so I could see how cute they were together. The first time I saw them I didn't like them. I even said to Alonso, "I thought my new initials would be cuter than that. I don't like them. I don't like my new last name." His response? "Well babe. Not much we can do about that." Classic male.} So reason #4 is that I get to use new initials, which by the way, I've grown to love. 

Now these are obviously light-hearted, fun reasons that I love being engaged. Maybe soon I will write a blog about some more serious reasons. (And if we're really lucky, Alonso will write one for us)!

Stay tuned for some more ramblings and crazy little antics from yours truly!

See ya on the other side,

Ashli <3

Easy-Baked-Veggies in 5 Awesome Steps

I loooovvveeee me a grill. Basically, anything you cook on a grill, I will eat it. And I miss grilled food. They are very, very expensive down here therefore we know a total of 2 people who own a grill - and they're married so that's just one grill. 

N-T-way, I made the yummiest thing the other day. Nothing profound or exotic. Just simple - easy - and yummy to the tummy! (And if you squint your eyes just right, it even tastes like it came off a grill - almost). 

If you're going to dinner at a friend's house and need to take a side - this is awesome! It can also be great for a quick snack for the kids or a fast, easy side at lunch. And all of it can happen in 5 super-easy super-fast steps!

Step 1: Choose your veggies and preheat your oven to 400 degrees F.

I chose zucchini, bell pepper, green beans, onion, and cherry tomatoes.

Step 2: Chop or slice your veggies - which ever you prefer. I sliced but either one works just as well. 

Step 3: Line your baking pan with tin foil and arrange your veggies neatly inside. Once inside the pan, you can season them easily. I like to keep like-veggies together in a row but you could just mix them up and throw them in the pan in any kind of fashion. 

Step 4: Drizzle Olive Oil over them and then season with salt, pepper, and Tony's. Stick it in the oven and bake for 20 minutes.

Step 5: Remove the veggies from the oven and LIGHTLY drizzle with soy sauce. Note: it does not take much of this at all so be careful! Put back in the oven for 10 more minutes or until veggies are soft/cooked/browned. At this point, you can bake at long as you want, according to your taste. I like mine a little browned because it gives it a nice grilled flavor. And seeing as how we don't have a grill in down here, it works well for us! 

And BAM! Easy, fast, fun, and YUMMY!! 

Alonso seems to love it, as do I so it's quickly becoming a favorite!! 

See ya on the other side, 

Ashli :) 

That New Tattoo : Deeper Than My Feet Could Ever Wander

In this blog post, I promised a blog about my *then new* tattoo.
Here it is...

Deeper than my feet could ever wander ...

What does that even mean? I can't walk more than a mile without complaining about some major back pains, so for me, "deeper than my feet could wander" wouldn't be very far at all. But that's not what the song means is it? No, no. It's far more than literal. And like the song, my tattoo means far more than what meets the eye.

When I came home from the World Race, I spoke at different churches and every time I told a story about our final debrief. I'd never heard the recently-made-popular song, Oceans by Hillsong United until the night my squad sang it during worship. I looked around at my squad passionately singing and I thought, "Man, I've gotta get this song, apparently." I later downloaded it and listened to it over and over and over on repeat as I lay in my hot, sticky, bunk bed waiting to fall asleep.

The next morning I woke up early to go with friends to a surf lesson. If you know me, you know I'm deathly afraid of sharks, deep water, and dark water. Even if the water is a foot deep but is dark, no ma'am - it ain't happening! However, it never occurred to me that in order to surf I would, in fact, need to go IN the ocean to find waves. The lesson on sand was cool but not exciting enough. I could not wait to catch a wave and it never struck me that this might be a little scary. Not until I was in deeper water, laying horizontally on my surf board, anyway. My surf partner, Erin, was going first so our instructor was helping her get ready for her first wave while I managed to float off to no-man's land on my own.

With the shore to my back and the horizon in front of me, panic set it. Although the water wasn't deeper than I am tall, I couldn't see further than an inch under it and, as we've just discussed, I was not okay with that. I starting thinking, "What would I do right now if sharks surrounded me? Would I scream? Would I move? Would I die right here on this surf board from a heart attack?" Call me dramatic but I was one scared little beginner. All I could see in front of me was a very large, vast ocean with God-knows-what swimming beneath it's surface. I began to pray for protection against sharks, and eels, and mean fish, and everything else I could think to name in my prayer.

Seconds later, my instructor came over, we started my lesson and I never saw a shark, THANK GOD. I'm obviously still alive to tell you this story. But that night at squad worship, something happened. It was that song. We sang it again. And this time, because I'd listened to it on repeat, I could sing some of the words...

You call me out upon the waters
The great unknown where feet may fail
And there I find You in the mystery
In oceans deep
My faith will stand

I closed my eyes and began to picture oceans deep. I saw myself back on that surf board. I can still picture all of this like it happened yesterday. 

And I will call upon Your name
And keep my eyes above the waves
When oceans rise
My soul will rest in Your embrace
For I am Yours and You are mine

At debrief our hostel had an amazing view of the beach. The reception area had a large porch that overlooked the beautiful green plants which were growing down the mountain towards the shore (pictured above). This is where our squad met and worshipped together. At night, we would stand on the porch, facing out toward the open air and because it was rainy season, we often sang to the sound of fresh rain and watched the sky light up in the distance with silent, soft bolts (pictured below).

In those final days and moments as a squad, life became surreal. The past 11 months of our lives had been the definition of a roller coaster. They were full of some of the most horrific, scariest, dissatisfying, challenging, brilliant, life-giving, life-altering, life-establishing moments that we'd known. Eleven months before this night, we all had some type of relationship with Jesus - good or bad, we had one. But at that point, in July 2013, standing on the porch of a hostel in Costa Rica, I watched 49 other young people cry out from their gut for Jesus to take them further than their faith could ever dream up; Where their trust is without boarders.

And in that moment, it got real.

Three weeks after that I would be moving back to Costa Rica to do things I'd never been trained to do. To walk through things I had not walked through before. And I would do it all without the 49 other people I'd just spent a a year of intense community with. I didn't know how it would look. I didn't know how it would feel or if I could even do it well.

But I knew this...

If I stay on the shore, I can do it all myself. When my feet are on dry land I'm fearless and independent and I can even be quite successful there. In fact, in the places my feet will stand, I probably don't need God.

So I sing. I cry out. I beg. For a new place.

Because in dark waters, everything is unknown. It's where feet fail and fear surrounds. So why request to go to that place?

For in the new place, I will fail. I will need Grace. I will need my Guide.

And it is there that His power is revealed. There is the place His glory shines brightest.

It is the new place that faith is just that ... faith.

When I posted this picture from debrief, the caption read "Can I just live here?" 

You call me out upon the waters
The great unknown where feet may fail
And there I find You in the mystery
In oceans deep
My faith will stand

And I will call upon Your name
And keep my eyes above the waves
When oceans rise
My soul will rest in Your embrace
For I am Yours and You are mine

Your grace abounds in deepest waters
Your sovereign hand
Will be my guide
Where feet may fail and fear surrounds me
You've never failed and You won't start now

So I will call upon Your name
And keep my eyes above the waves
When oceans rise
My soul will rest in Your embrace
For I am Yours and You are mine


Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders
Let me walk upon the waters
Wherever You would call me
Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander
And my faith will be made stronger
In the presence of my Savior

I will call upon Your name
Keep my eyes above the waves
My soul will rest in Your embrace
I am Yours and You are mine

the tattoo I promised to blog about ages ago 

Engagement Photos and Such

Hand in hand, we'll make it. 

Last November, a precious friend took pictures of Alonso and I while she was here

 on her World Race. I loved them so much and wanted to plaster them all over 

Facebook but they look A LOT like engagement photos and at the time, it was "too

 soon." Ha, so I waited. But now, since we are ACTUALLY engaged and I'm not 

just a dreamy little girl anymore, I will post them with our ACTUAL engagement 

photos! :) SUPER GRANDE THANK YOU to Estefanía Herrera Photography and

Carly Jean Photography for working your magic and making us look all pretty and 

stuff. 

Estefania's work: 

Beautiful Costa Rica!

Warm and cozy in the rainy photo shoot. 

My love, my life. 

He keeps me laughing.

To see more pictures by Estefania and Carly, click here and go to our Facebook album! 

Carly's work:

I love that we are in a coffee field - so Costa! 

This is on the playground of my school here. I love the significance the location.

Costa Rican roads.

Rainy day turned beautiful.

Gorgeous Costa Rican mountains.

See ya on the other side, 

Ashli 

Just a Boring Life Update

See? Even the kid is bored! So we should get started ....

HELLO! If you can't tell from the dramatic, all-caps salutation, I am very excited to share some updates with you. But first, let's review.

Last time we talked, Alonso and I had just gotten back from our mission trip to Panama and we were watching God blow our socks off with His provision. He not only provided all the money needed for the trip but also used several of His people to bless us with extra support for our monthly expenses here. PEAISE GOD for you people. Your generous actions have been clutch.

At the time, we were waiting to pick up some of the final documents needed to start our visa application from the courthouse and were anxious to receive them. Also during that time, Alonso started his blog and let's just say he's been more faithful with his than I have with mine. (Ooops!) He has a lot of good stuff to say and you can read it all HERE!

Since then, we've gotten all the paperwork needed to send in our initial petition for Alonso's visa. We had to snail-mail them to our attorney in Mississippi and after sitting in customs for 20 days, they finally arrived safely. Our poor attorney, he's been such a trooper and put up with me blowing up his inbox. #blessit #iamtooimpatientforthis

On another note, Alonso has started drinking less coke and more water. Probably just because he got tired of me nagging him about. But hey, whatever works, right?

I recently told my kids that their last day of school (July 4th) is also my last day of school. It was hard, man. I love those little people like they are my own. But this point leads to my next update...

I'M MOVING HOME, sort of! Alonso and I have some ministry stuff to wrap up and take care of during July and then I'm flying home early August. My little sister graduates from William Carey with her MASTERS in Psychology (shoutout to her awesomeness) on August 9th. Then, in September my family is going on an Alaskan cruise! YAY!! With me on the mission field for the last two years and Lesley finishing school and working, it's been a REAL hot minute since we had a family vacation. Also, we didn't really throw down for my parents 25th wedding anniversary and this year will be their 30th so we're wrapping it all up in a cruise and calling it family vacay! Oh, also? Anyone remember Jennifer? My sister/exchange student from Ecuador? She's coming too!!! SCORE! So I will be home for .... well, who knows how long? before I come back to Costa Rica to be with my beau and help him with ministry here.

Speaking of him again, did I mention his band? Yeah - his band got back together and it's going really well. Not exactly my choice of musical genre but they sing unto the Lord and that's what is important, right? So they've been recording their newest album and getting ready for some gigs they have coming up. You can follow them on Instagram HERE! So as far as ministry goes, God has opened some crazy-awesome doors for their band to minister to people who may not otherwise listen to the gospel. It's fun for me to watch.


Alonso is also finishing school and doing some graphic designing. He's all sorts of talented at that so if you need some graphics for, I don't know, whatever you might need graphical design for, let me know! I'll hook you up ;) A website? A logo? A band? Branding? I don't know about all that jazz but it sounds important.

We still don't have a wedding date because, like I've said before, we depend on the timing of the visa - unfortunately. So one of the BIGGEST prayer requests we have right now is for God to move us through the system VERY quickly. Some people go through in 5 months, other go through in 8, and for others it takes years. We need and want to go as quickly as possibly while obviously acknowledging Who is controlling it all.

Well, I believe that's a wrap for now.

Leave a comment and update us on really cool things happening in YOUR life!

Mucho love,
Ashlonso 

To Mr. or Ms. Dissatisfied

Last night, as I was falling asleep, I scrolled through my Facebook newsfeed. When I saw a status my friend Jane* posted I thought, “Did she steal my diary?” Some of the things she wrote were the exact words I’ve written in journals, prayed, and said out loud to friends. As I wrote a response to her I realized this was much of what I’ve wanted to blog about for a long time but never could gather all the words.

How many words would it take to describe the journey of Truth that God has sent me to wildly on? How will I explain, in so many words, what He’s done in my heart?

So today I share with you, The Dissatisfied, my thoughts on leaving the American Dream.

Jane: "I have so much on my mind tonight. I don't really want to be here. My heart is in Costa Rica, but I'm trying to just focus on the fact that maybe God has me here for now."

Me to Jane: About 2 1/2 years ago, I was standing in my closet on the phone with my mentor and I'll never forget her words. In my complaining about how corporate America and the American Dream couldn't appeal less to me, she said, "Yeah, Ash. You just don't belong in the States. This just isn't where you're supposed to be."

Now, this was after MONTHS (maybe years) of me and God wrestling around with ideas about where I'm supposed to be and what I'm supposed to be doing. In 2010 I decided to follow Jesus with reckless abandonment and that was when He led me to the book Radical. That book shook me. I started questioning the American Dream and how to give it up. What would that even look like? What was I supposed to do? I remember sitting on my living room couch, looking around at all the cute home decorations and asking, "Am I supposed to sale all of this?" Now - I was still new at TRULY FOLLOWING Jesus so keep in mind that all of my questions during that time came from a very naive, "untrained" (if you will) heart.

So fast forward to early 2011 and I was horribly dissatisfied with life. I was happy, yes. I was still following Jesus and I had fun with my friends, ministry, and such. But I KNEW there was something more - something we were all missing. I still just didn't know where it was or how to find it.

I had just gone on my first mission trip (to Costa Rica, actually) and I was burning for more. Not even a good church service satisfied my hungry heart any longer. There was a part of God that I was not experiencing and it left me feeling shallow and superficial in my faith. Finally in February 2012 I took a step and applied for the World Race.

Ok pause there and let me attack this one, keeping the above information in mind...

Jane: "I also have my birthday on my mind. One month from today I'll be 28. And I'm single. That's crazy. It seems like all of my friends are married and having babies and all of their dreams are coming true."

Me to Jane: In college, I dated a guy for three years and in my mind I would never be with anyone else. I never even considered another guy being a part of my future because to me, when you date someone that long (no matter how unhealthy) you can just get stuck there. Therefore, to me, I was ready to marry him and then when we broke up that "ready for marriage" mindset just stayed with me. This isn't something I realized at the time but I now see in hindsight. So - any guy I dated after him I thought I would marry. I wasn't following Jesus at the time so I had a very worldly view of marriage. When I say worldly I don't necessarily mean sinful, I just mean that I was too young and immature to understand the TRUE values of a marriage.

Moving on... I think I could say that from that point on, I thought I could get married ‘any time now’. The next guy would be him. Then it ended. So the next guy would be him. Then it ended... and it went on and on. For years I watched my friends from all walks of life getting engaged, married, and having babies – and feeling like they were leaving me behind. Like they were in this club I had no way to be a part of.

Eventually that added to my dissatisfaction. Fast forward up to 2010. Now that I knew I was sold out for Christ, I thought I deserved a partner in ministry. A companion, a husband. It was my focus for a hot little minute and that's when God sent me into a whirlwind of studying and pursuing singleness with Him, my mentor, and a couple of other girls.

People would give me advice on how to "wait" and tell me analogies about how God put Adam to sleep to create Eve and how, when it's time, God will wake up my Adam and bla bla bla .... I've heard it all. Read all the books, blogs, articles, and bought all the t-shirts. There's no REAL advice I would give someone when it comes to waiting for their husband except this: it. is. worth. the. wait.

I cannot say that enough. People would tell me that, and I of course believed them, but it didn't become real in my heart until I met Alonso.

Click here to keep reading in this blog series!

To Mr. or Ms. Dissatisfied II

Jane: "Which leads me to this thought. Maybe my "white picket fence, American dream" plans aren't what God has in store for me?"

Me to Jane: It's probably not. You don't have these passions for Costa Rica just because you randomly went there once and liked the food. Your passions and desires aren't random. It's not by chance - none of it. So I would venture to say that no, God likely does not have a white picket fence in mind for you. And I LOVE that for you!!!

HOWEVER - if I can add this too... I've realized, with me at least, that God takes the passions He’s given me through seasons. Two years ago I could not get out of the U.S. fast enough. Now? I can't get BACK there fast enough. I won't pretend to know why God does what He does. All I know is from my own experience with Him and I know that He changes my heart on things all the time - but ALWAYS according to what He has planned for me next.

I'll give you one example on that: When I moved here, I wasn't against a relationship but I definitely was not looking for one. And certainly not one with a native. Although Alonso and I were very good friends and he honored me and respected me so well - I was NOT interested in settling down. At that point I was fresh off the race, twenty-six years old young, and more independent. In my mind, I had a lot of life to live and wasn't ready to be slowed down by having to sacrifice and compromise and all those things you have to do when you get married.

I started praying about it. Asking married women around me questions like, 'Exactly HOW MUCH do you have to sacrifice in marriage? Cause I can be pretty selfish." Within a weekend, God had completely changed my heart and I saw Alonso through different lenses. The really cool thing about the power of God is that things can change in an INSTANT. One second I was walking down the street of Heredia, CR without a marital prospect at all and the next second I was being introduced to the man who would become my husband. It's that fast. And it will be that fast for you too! (By it* I mean, the thing God uses to change your life in that instant. Be it a mate, a move, a whatever).

Jane: "I've often felt like God forgot about me. But what if it's really that He just has something different in mind?”

Me to Jane: YES! Exactly. I can’t tell you how many times God has told me that He had something different for me. That what He had planned for me, no one else would do. That the people who’s lives I envy, He has something else for them. That they would never do the things He was calling me to do and vise versa. That He was setting me APART. Apart from everything I knew and was confortable with. APART from everything I thought my life would be. Because He had things ready for me that were beyond anything I could ever dream up. Which leads me to the last part of what I want to say:

Jane: “How cool is it to know that my future is in the hands of the person who created the whole universe? I have complete faith that He is in control. Even when I feel alone. I'm so glad that He didn't let me pick my own plan. I know without a shadow of a doubt that I would have picked wrong. I am so excited to see what is in store for me in the years to come. I know that it will be better than any dream I could have imagined.”

Me to Jane: I have literally said (and prayed) those exact words. “Thank you God for being in control so we don’t have to be. Because I would mess it up every time.” This can be a very lonely time if you allow it to be. To an extent God needs to de-attach you and disconnect you from things you will need to let go of. And to that same extent He needs to get you alone so He can speak directly to your heart without the noise of the world (friends, family, distractions, etc). But at the same time, I will say, surround yourself with people who are in your corner. Everyone won’t understand, and many will think you’re crazy. But surround yourself with those who CONSTANTLY, (and I do mean constantly) will speak LIFE over you. Those who believe in the vision God has given you and tell you to go for it. It will be important for you to be around people who are as radical and like-minded as you.

And the last piece of advice I want to give you is this: Just do it.

If we sit around in cruise control waiting for everything to fall perfectly into our laps, we’ll be waiting forever. Now, what I’m NOT saying is that God won’t line it all up for you. We both know God is previous. He goes before us and prepares everything for us. But it requires action on our part. And the only way to really get in the water is to dive in headfirst. If you’re finding yourself in the place I was in, itching for more, then go find more. No one else is going to do it for you so it’s time to act. Don’t waste any more time sitting around wondering, “What is God’s will for my life?” --- that will just slow you down. Ask God simple, yes or no questions and follow what He says. “God, do you want me to move to Costa Rica?” – if He says yes, then move. “God, do you want me to start this orphanage?” – No. “Ok, God do you want me to start this school?” No. “Ok, God I feel like you’re calling me to this city. Do you want me to go there?” Yes. Then go.

You know what I mean? One step at a time and GO for IT!

I love you and I want to see you thrive in what God is calling you to. Use me for a soundboard or a prayer warrior or at times, and example of what NOT to do, haha. We all mess it up at some point, right?

So Readers, does this conversation from Jane and I resonate with you at all?

Are you dissatisfied with chasing a lifestyle that won’t fulfill you? Do you feel God has called you specifically to Corporate America for reasons of ministry? 

Someone once said, “Where there’s people, there’s ministry.” So at the end of the day, it’s simple:

Listen. Then respond accordingly.

There’s a reason we don’t all have the same call.