"I Have Gone Before You..."

Without going into unnecessary details, which I'm very talented at, here are the essentials:

- I love everything about flying, except the actual flying part. I love taking off and landing and I adore the hustle and bustle and chaos of airports. But I dread flying. I find it boring and scary and I LOATHE turbulence. Every time that I fly, which isn't often, I pray constantly. I ask to sit by the window because I like the idea of somehow flying closer to the angels flying along side my plane. Silly, I know... but whatever gets you through a flight, right? Friday, I found out that I do, in fact, travel alone to Costa Rica. However, before having time to worry about that, God reminded me of Psalm 16:8. "I know the Lord is always with me. I will not be shaken, for He is right beside me." So when I drive to the airport, when all four of my flights take off and when all four of them land, the many hours I am in the air, and the drive home from the airport - He will be with me. If I sit in the aisle, He is with me. If I sit by the window, He is with me. If I am squeezed between two people who snore, He is with me. If my plane goes down and I never make it to Costa Rica, He will be with me. (Don't tell my dad I just said that.) Nothing happens on His watch that He doesn't know about - and time and everything past it is on His watch. He created me and promised to be with me, always. 

- So when I make it to Costa Rica .... what next? Oh yeah, I'm there to share the Gospel. How? When? With who? What does it even look like? What if the people I talk to aren't receptive? What if no one listens to me? What if I don't know the right words and, heaven forbid, The Spirit doesn't draw the person I'm witnessing to? I become overwhelmed with these thoughts and begin to feel insignificant for the Kingdom. Not for long, though. He won't allow it. To Deuteronomy 31:8 He sends me.

"Do not be afraid or discouraged, for the Lord will personally go ahead of you. He will be with you; He will neither fail you nor abandon you." 

And John 14:16-17 "I will ask the Father, and He will give you another Advocate, who will never leave you. He is the Holy Spirit, who leads into all truth." 

Wow. The Lord has personally gone before me. He has personally gone to the Costa Ricans and prepared the way for my team to go there. He has personally began to prepare their hearts for His truth. And He has personally chosen me, and the others on my team, individually to speak that truth into their lives. Man, He is an amazing God. AND, the Holy Spirit is going to lead me into that truth. He is going to guide my steps there- and He will never leave me as well. Oh Father, I am so unworthy. Direct Your servant, oh God. I desire to please You. 

I had a Skype meeting today with my team leaders and members. What sweet joy to hear the voices of the people God is sending me out with. Fellow laborers. Right off the bat, a girl named Mandy messaged me about the trip. Come to find out, she is my age and we share a lot of the same challenges. She is traveling "alone" as well and she is also a little worried about her support coming through. As we talked about our lack of funding so far, I could feel the anxiety begin to fester in my stomach. "You can't do this, Ashli. If you're going to trust God (and you don't have a choice there) then you have to trust Him with everything," I reminded myself, "and that includes funding." Mandy and I chatted for a while and it was a great relief to talk to someone in the same boat as me. God's sovereignty never ceases to astonish me. In efforts to serve Him, I decided to go on this trip, despite the circumstances. And He honored that by meeting my needs before I ever even knew I had them. I'm so undeserving, but He doesn't care. He still loves me. He still blesses me. He still gives me a little more of Him everyday.  

Father let me remember that You have gone before me, in every circumstance. Particularly this one. Let me find joy in serving the natives for Your glory and give me the strength to keep serving when it doesn't feel joyful. Put away my anxious thoughts and allow me trust fully in Your name. Amen.

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So at the end of every day, I CANNOT wait to go. I cannot wait to be there and love on the children. I cannot wait to plant churches and sing praises. I cannot wait to share God's Word with people who have never heard His name. I cannot wait to experience the unending power of our King. I cannot wait to evangelize, disciple, serve, and share....  and do it for the glory of the One who created it all.

click this link!!! ----->  www.e3partners.org/ashliblackwell