Leftover Pizza

She-would-not-let-go... like, for anything. I mean, she fights for 42 inches of height and we were in a 6ft. deep end, after all. Her grip was so tight I think I still have finger prints around my neck and this was two days ago. Because when the water around you doubles your height and you're too terrified to swim, you grab on for dear life to anything. Anything that will float and keep your head above water. When I stopped pulling at her small waist and she stopped screaming "Noooooooo!!" she heard me whisper calmly, "Azah. You have to stop holding on so tight and trust that I will not let go of you."
In the middle of all that quietness, I heard Him whisper too. Pretty much the exact same sentence, just insert  "Ashli." Like usual, I went on with whatever was in front of me - in this case, an innocent little black girl horrified of the countless gallons of water surrounding us. He'll be sure to bring it back up, He always does.


We were on our first family-that's-not-really-a-family road trip. Me + 3 African American children + no wedding ring = a whole lot of funny looks and a whole lot more fun.

 Brian

 Azah

Meikayla

Without the gory details, we were staying in a super fun hotel on the Mississippi River. Literally, on the river. It was complete with an indoor/outdoor restaurant/lounge with quaint outside seating on the riverside and an indoor pool for times like these. Three trips to the pool in two days ... we clearly took advantage of this indoor luxury. (Thank you Wal-Mart for having $6 swimsuits in the middle of January.) Our second night at the pool, we ordered pizza and cheesy-bread which only took Papa John's one hour to deliver, but who's counting when there is pool water, better yet - hot tub water, to be had? 

[Obviously, Meikayla (the eldest) was more concerned with the "cold pool" which had the "deep waters." Much too old and mature to be in the "kiddie pool" or "the hot one" which most of us ridiculous people know as a spa/jacuzzi.]

Now where was I? Oh yes! The pizza that we couldn't eat all of. Never fear; Cold pizza is better the next day, anyway. Regardless, we had big plans the next day! That's right... a basketball game. Apparently it is completely unacceptable for 8-year old Meikayla to share delicious cheesy nachos with me and 5-year old Azah. I'm 25... and the one paying... but what do I know? So, TWO orders of $4 nachos, please. (And bring on the jalapeños para mi, gracias!) Her "I want everything and I want it now" attitude didn't stop her from being one of the three most precious children in the place, though. Just check out these school-spirited outfits.... 

Speaking of an attitude-of-want, Meikayla thinks she is supposed to eat every. single. hour. (A not-so-great characteristic she got from her not-so-biological mother... aka: me.) Annoying as it may be, we carry it none the less. Which makes perfect sense for her to beg me for a piece of the leftover pizza every other time the clock strikes a new hour. At this point, we are on our way home. Allow me to use this time to let you know that our 150 minute drive home took a whopping FIVE hours. Yes, your read correctly. Due to my lack of road knowledge and apparent inability to listen to the GPS/ on my handy dandy Galaxy S, it took us just that long to get home. Read and follow road signs? Who does that? Not a chance...

Sooooo, where we should have been home by 3:30pm, we were still on the road at 5:30pm. And if you have done the math, you know that Meikayla has asked for pizza at least three times since lunch at noon. 

[Approximately 5:00pm] - something kinda funny happened. this is how it went down: 

MK:    Ms. Ashli, can we have some of the leftover pizza from yesterday? (As if this is a new         

question and I don't know to which pizza she is referring) 

Me:     Meikayla, what have I told you the last three times you asked?

MK:    That I need to wait til the next meal.

Me:     And is it time for our next meal?

MK:    Ummm? It's 5pm.... ?

Me:     Oh. Ok - if you will wait 30 minutes - just hold out a little longer- we are going to have a really, really good meal. Much better than leftover pizza ... a really good, hot meal. Just trust me on this one.

Silence. 

I thought to myself: "Gosh, kids are so much work. If only they could see the big picture. Then they would know that something better was waiting... and only 30 minutes away. I mean, that's right around the corner. Just be patient, for the love of Moses!!" 

Then I heard Him whisper, "Oh hey. You get that concept now?"

Silence. 

In retrospect, did God really just equate my desire for safety and comfort to clinging to ANYTHING that will float in the deep end? I think yes. And my desire for self and instant gratification to leftover pizza? I think yes. Did he really just teach me two important lessons about trust .... in one weekend.... with children... out of my own mouth? I think yes. 

At times I wonder if they are actually my words coming out. 

And like usual, I go on with whatever is in front of me. Paying attention to the shiny toys I crave more than I crave  time with Him. But He'll be sure to bring it back up.

He always does. 

I will say of the LORD, "He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust." Psalm 91:2